"You must be older than the new and eternal era of peace in the Middle East to be served in this establishment!"

 

"Yeah, kid, I'm being sarcastic.  Otherwise that crone over your shoulder wouldn't be able to drink here."  

"See, it's funny because they've never stopped consecrating their holy lands with their own blood and the blood of innocents on the other side?  Get it?  It's not so much 'funny ha-ha.'  More 'funny we're-all-gonna-die.'"