Last Splash

"You must be older than 'Cannonball' to be served in this establishment."

Stupid human tricks

"You must be older than The Late Show with David Letterman to be served in this establishment."

I can't find a copy online, but if memory serves, the intro to the inaugural episode was a montage of Ed Sullivan clips introducing bands (including The Letterman) cut together to make an awkward impression of Sullivan introducing, for example, "the wonderful <slice> the magnificent <slice> the talented <slice> ... <slice> David <slice> Letterman!"

Anyway, given the recent announcement (above), it's kind of a poignant milestone.

I still blame him for cutting Louie C.K. out as revenge for auditioning for his job.  Cold, Dave.  Cold. 

"You must be older than Living Single to be served in this establishment."

Honestly, any jokey title would just be pointless

"You must be older than the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers to be served in this establishment."
 

 

 

(xkcd link)

Wario

My son just told me he thinks Wario is "Mario's evil uncle " wtf.
— Ken Jennings (@KenJennings) August 17, 2014

"You must be older than Mario & Wario to be served in this establishment."

"Evidently this was not, in fact, the first appearance, as Wario had shown up in a Gameboy title the year before, but this was the first time he was used in an actual NES game."

"I, uh... I don't know anything about Wario."

"Wow, sorry, I just zoned out there.  You still here?  You must really want that drink... or else I've driven you catatonic.  Either way, first one's on the house."

Oh Carolina

"You must be older than Shaggy's musical career to be served in this establishment."

Who you callin' "cracker"? Oh, right. I get it.

"You must be older than Kerosene Hat to be served in this establishment."

Surf Ninjas

"You must be older than Rob Schneider's first starring (so to speak) role to be served in this establishment."

"You must be older than the Michael Jackson child sexual abuse allegations to be served in this establishment."

River of Dreams

"You must have been born during Billy Joel's recording career to be served in this establishment."

"You must be older than Magic: The Gathering to be served in this establishment."

Become What You Are

"You must be older than Juliana Hatfield's recording career to be served in this establishment."

Tuesday Night Music Club

"You must be older than Sheryl Crow's recording career to be served in this establishment."